Luellen Smiley

Archive for the ‘DICE’ Category

THE DICE on UNCLE MYRON

In CREATIVE NON-FICTION, DICE, ENTERTAINMENT, GANGSTERS, LIFESTYLE, MAFIA, ORGANIZED CRIME, PERSONAL, Random Thoughts, WRITING LIFE on June 30, 2009 at 3:40 am

The throw of the dice the week lands on adventures in Newark and Manhattan with Uncle Myron. Myron is my Uncle by way of tradition in the world of my father. Most of his associates and friends were Uncles. It was after the New York Post published my story on ”Confessions of a Mob Kid”, that Myron wrote to me.    

Our first meeting.

“Hello sweetheart. I’ll meet you downstairs in your hotel at 10:00.”

“Can we make it 10:30, I’m running late.”

“Sure.”

A thick steamy humid rain splattered against the hotel window in Newark, New Jersey. Coming to Jersey has everything to do with Myron and my mother. She was born and raised here, and so was Uncle Myron; the man I am meeting downstairs as soon as I dry my hair. His father, Sugie, was a friend of the family. Not the Smiley family, the other family that I only acknowledged after writing a memoir.  

The phone rang at 10:00 am.

“Hi sweetheart I’m downstairs.”

“I’m getting ready as fast as I can.”

“Well make it faster.” Click.

I had a feeling that he’d be early. Dad pulled the same stunt on me.

Downstairs in the lobby, an imposing man wearing a black fedora and a black over coat, was standing in front of two younger men. They looked like blue collar guys; dressed to make contact with machinery or heavy equipment. They all turned my way as I approached them.

“Hey, little lady! Come on-we’ll have a cup of coffee. I have to talk to the boys for a few minutes.”

“Boys, this is Luellen. Okay, everyone sit down.”

“You know who this lady is?” Myron asked. They both stared at me.

“Her father was Benny Siegel’s partner, and a friend of my father.”

They nodded.

“Luellen, these boys are from Russia. They’re good people–the best, and highly educated.  Where was your Dad born sweetheart?”

“Kiev.” I answered.

Simultaneously the two young men, started to speak about our Russian family name, Smehoff, and the meaning in Russian.

“It translates something like joy, and to be happy.”

“That’s why the immigration officers changed it to Smiley.” I said.

The boys, as Myron called them, talked history, politics and world affairs before I’d finished my double espresso.

“Is the Russian Mafia very powerful?” I asked.

“There is no Russian Mafia. The power is with the government, and it’s hidden agencies.” One of them answered. I regretted making such a stupid comment.  

“All right, now we’re going to go over here and talk a little business.”  Myron stood up. He looked down at me, ” Okay.”

They shook my hand and nodded, without any affectation, and followed Myron to the next table. I’d been here before, many times, I knew the routine, sit and wait. 

After the meeting, Myron and I went to the car. 

“I was in prison with the kid, the fair haired one. He just got another sentence. I’m trying to help him; I have to do what I can. He’s got a wife and child.”

I listened to Myron; every word. His language was not formed in college or through books. It is one of people who’ve survived the dangers of living outside the law;of living in Africa, when Chicago sent him to be the manager of a joint venture slot machine operation with the Arabs, Israel, and every Latin American country from South of the Rio Grande to Patagonia. He moved machines through un-chartered borders, and learned the language of the people. It gives a person the sophistication that enables them to stand up in the hall of justice, where judges and informants cat-walk their power, to the chagrin of men who live by their word, honor, and secrecy. Myron is raw as beef; there is no fat between the lines. He says something; you know it came from experience.     

“What did the kid do?” I asked.

“It’s all bullshit.” 

I’d heard that before too; and I knew it wasn’t any of my business.

“Would you like to see where your mother grew up?”

“Yes!” 

“What street was it—Schley?”

“Yes, 35 Schley.” How did he know the street? I don’t remember telling Myron or writing about  Myron drove slowly, it had been years since he’d been in this part of town. 

“I’m not sure if this street will go through. They didn’t have a freeway going through this part of town in the thirties. Wait a minute-if I go up here, and turn around,” Myron drove with one hand, without a seatbelt, wired into the blackberry ringing at ten minute intervals.  He grew up in Newark, so he was determined to find his way back to Schley Street. We circled for a few minutes. He made U-turns in the middle of intersections, and paid no heed to other drivers. I recognized that routine, Dad used to drive with two fingers and read his mail simultaneously.    

“This was all Jewish at one time. Look! There’s the park where your mother played as a little girl. I can guarantee it.” 

The park was set in the midst of a deteriorating neighborhood; the Victorian homes were boarded up or used for storage. The park was the last remaining landmark of the turn of the century Newark culture; a society that pushed buggies on a Sunday afternoon, dressed in top hats and lace dresses.

“There’s the famous Tavern. It was one of the most famous restaurants back then. Your mother went there, and across the street is the high school. This is Wweequahic neighborhood. Newark was a flashy town back then, better than New York because you knew everyone. I knew every family and if I didn’t, someone I knew did. We looked out for each other.”

“Like Longy did.”  I knew Myron’s father was partners with the legendary Jewish boss of New Jersey, Abner Zwillman, who was known as Longy.  

“Longy is another story all together little lady. You cannot grasp what the man was about on a short drive through Newark.” 

“Look there’s the house.” Myron pointed. “It’s a two-family, your mother lived in a very nice place, see. Now you know. Are you happy?”

Myron picked up the phone. “Yea, meet us in the city-I’ll tell you later what time.”  I looked at the house; imagining Nana, and the grandfather I never met inside, and my little mom standing in the front yard with her German Sheppard.  I have a photo of her standing in front of this house. She is holding a parasol over her head, and even at five she looked ready to model.  To be continued… Any dice to throw email: folliesls@aol.com

Uncategorized « Galleryloulou’s Weblog

In ARTS, CREATIVE NON-FICTION, CULTURE, DICE, HORSERACING, LIFESTYLE, LIFESTYLE COLUMNIST, Life, ON THE SOLO JOURNEY, PERSONAL, RELATIONSHIPS, Random Thoughts, SANTA FE WRITER, SMILEY'S DICE, WRITING LIFE, photography, poetry on April 14, 2009 at 11:08 pm

NO DICE NO LUCK

In ARTS, CREATIVE NON-FICTION, CULTURE, DICE, ENTERTAINMENT, LIFESTYLE, LIFESTYLE COLUMNIST, PERSONAL, Random Thoughts, SANTA FE WRITER, SMILEY'S DICE on February 8, 2009 at 3:48 pm
The throw of the dice this week falls on adventures in livingness when the luck runs out. I was inside Borders drinking a raspberry latte, and browsing the new non-fiction titles.  Borders in Santa Fe is a cross between a library, a day-care center, and a time filler for truly retired people who love books.  On this particular Saturday, the aisles were jammed; kids sprawled on the floor kicking their legs, and mother’s rummaging through big plastic bags filled with snacks and toys.  Contented unshaven men were seated in leather chairs reading books off the shelves, and the multitasketeers’ read, paced, and talked on the cell-phone while circulating the magazine racks.  The café was cluttered with dutiful students posed at their laptops, and young teenagers ordered paragraph drinks they paid for with credit cards. 

 I’d just left the Cocteau Theater where loyal readers of Michael McGarrity’s mystery novels were seated listening to him talk about his next book, “Dead or Alive.” I’ve never read his books; I wanted to hear him speak, just to see if I could imagine one day I might stand in front of an audience and talk about my book.  Michael was effortlessly engaging. No, I have a long long journey before I speak like that.  

“ This is the last stop of my three-month tour. I’m happy to be back home. And even more happy because on Friday I signed a new two-year contract for my next book. Believe me, today it takes more than luck, you have to have a track record.”  

That got me thinking; how people use to say; ‘it was good luck, or good fortune that I got published.’ If Michael McGarrity is right, then what we need is a lot more people buying books.  Our economy isn’t going to recover because of good luck, and all those people who lost their jobs, aren’t going to depend on luck to get a new job.

In fact luck is sort of passé. 

What was most interesting about that Saturday is that of all the little boutiques in Sanbusco Center, Borders had the crowd.  Books, even if they are hard as heck to get written, published and printed are the cheapest form of entertainment that I’ve found. Lately, I’ve drifted into an adventure in  Santa Fe history, so I picked up two books.  It has to do with my own stimulus package; how to balance the scathing news with something more rousing.  The first book, “Walks in Literary Santa Fe,” by Barbara Harrelson is a companion to a spontaneous walk through town. Just about every building used to be something more appealing: La Fonda Hotel was a Harvey House until 1969. The resplendent Fred Harvey made waitressing a fashion statement, with his Harvey Girls, and then Arthur Freed turned it into a MGM musical. My mother was in the film, a singing and dancing Harvey Girl.

 The Palace of the Governors, “the oldest public building still in use in the United States,” and built around 1610 is a museum today. Once it was home to Santa Fe governors, two of whom were writers. In 1943 the Palace became the meeting place for the Atom Bomb Quartet, aka as the Manhattan Project. Santa Fe’s first bookstore,Villagra, opened in 1927 inside the classical Spanish Sena Plaza.  “The owner served tea and gossip every day, and martinis at 4:00 every afternoon.” In that bookstore, Willa Cather was seen making notes, for her book, “Death Comes to The Archbishop,” about Santa Fe.

 Even my house, The Elliott Barker House, is historic because it was occupied by the man who gave Smokey Bear a career, when he took the cub to the White House and coined the phrase, ‘Only you can prevent forest fires.’ Mr. Barker was the state’s first Game Warden, and a zealous conservationist, when there was more land than building in Santa Fe. The Elliott Barker Trail north of Taos is one I hiked, before I knew I’d be living in his house, and feeding the sparrows.  He wrote half a dozen books about wilderness living in New Mexico.   

I mean it’s not New York, which could eat up an entire lifetime tracing the former famous residents of brownstones.  Santa Fe will be 400 years old this summer and I want to know who I should be celebrating.  For the price of $12.95, I have this great book, the references to other great Santa Fe literature, and a sort of walking tool to take with me when I’m on the streets.  

If you live in San Diego and remember my arts column every month, then you know how much I love to dwell in the house of the artist. As Black Monday’s get darker, I find solace in treading history in books, museums and film.

Any dice to throw: Email folliesls@aol.com

WAITING ON 43RD AND MADISON AVENUE

In CREATIVE NON-FICTION, DICE, LIFESTYLE, LIFESTYLE COLUMNIST, MEMOIR, PERSONAL, SMILEY'S DICE on July 11, 2008 at 1:27 pm

The throw of the dice this week falls on twenty minutes before the meeting. I was standing on the corner of 43rd and Madison Avenue in Manhattan waiting for 3:00 PM.

I cannot even remember the last time I waited for a meeting;it was so long ago I used to do meetings.  That may account for the trepidation and anxiousness. I was waiting to meet my literary agent. I had nothing in my handbag except cosmetics, cell phone, tissue and notepad. The chapter he is waiting for hadn’t materialized yet.

On the train from Albany I dutifully scribbled notes about possible hooks, subplots, and discoveries. It had been two days since I’d landed in New York, and settled in at Follies House. Those days were not spent writing, or romancing the countryside, I was applying my arm strength to the floors, windows, and furnishings that had been sorely neglected. Whenever we neglect a part of our lives the results are the same, they deteriorate. Whether it is friendship, wrinkles, or wood; neglect has a face of it’s own.    

While I polished and wiped I thought about the chapter that wasn’t written. I was applying the sparkling results of domestic chores, to the failed writing exercises. That’s why the twenty minutes before walking into the meeting, I had butterflies as big as birds. My flushed face looked more horrified than enraptured with the excitement of Manhattan. 

Madison Park is just around the corner from his office. Minor league vignettes protruded from the trees and benches, but they didn’t attract my attention as they normally would. My feet were swelling in my high heels, and the humidity was working right through my powdered face. I was prepared for a de-briefing with a panel of publishers, critics, and a disapproving audience instead of one literary agent. Had someone come up to me and tapped my shoulder I would have jumped into their arms. Preoccupied as I was, I noticed men in the city as they swooshed by in rapid purposeful succession, the suit and tie type and in the same frame, the limp defeated bench homesteaders, dragging on cigarette butts.

 Ten minutes before three, I took the elevator up to the 3rd floor, stepped out, and faced the reception desk. A young woman looked up,

” Luellen Smiley.”

“ Yes.” 

” Great to meet you! Frank just got back. Have a seat for a minute–can I get you something?”

“I know I’m early. Water will be fine.”  Before I took a sip, she began chattering away, the kind of soothing, doesn’t have any purpose sort of conversation, that makes very new, self conscious, self absorbed writers feel relaxed.

Frank came out to meet me and shake my hand. Then he apologized for the size of his office. I sat down next to him, and noticed it was suspiciously unmarked of awards, personal affirmations, and marks of literary achievement. It was another means of relaxing the writer. All of it worked. We sat side by side and talked straight through an hour and a half. As conscientious as I was, with a note pad and pen at hand, I took no notes. After some encouragement, I blurted out, ’Frank, I’ just don’t have the hook you’re looking for,’ to which he replied, “You’ll find it. I’m sure of it.”

As I left the office, my feet returned to their normal side, my lips and eyes unclenched, and I drifted outside, and hailed a cab for Penn station.

On the train ride back to Ballston Spa all I could think of was the first page of the new chapter. I wrote it in my head and jotted a few notes. Over the next 11 days, I wrote five more first chapter pages, and shredded all of them. I returned to the mops and polish rags, and worked my way through the anxiety of not having that first page started.   

On the twelfth day, which happened to be the 4th of July I stopped trying. Instead, I took a run in the country and vanished into the tranquility of upstate New York. The under-developed back roads where the absence of cars and buses enable you to see the butterflies landing on wild flowers, people pruning trees, and mowing their lawns. I yearned for a camera, as I ran past a man on his mower, steering with one hand, and holding his little boy in the other. The snapshots came to me all day long; like slices of apple pie small town America. In the front yards of Victorian homes, men flipped burgers on a BBQ, while women fussed with tableware and the children ran across the yard chasing a dog.  I thought of those glass bottles you shake and snow settles on a gingerbread house. 

Later in the day I joined friends for a neighborhood party and listened to conversation as fresh and unscented as bare wood. I was conspicuously over dressed, but didn’t feel malicious judgement, just curiosity, as if I was a new specimen that landed without proper introduction. 

From the party, we drove into downtown Saratoga. We sat on the terrace of the Wine Bistro watching tourists’ parade up and down Broadway. Everyone had toddlers; either strapped to their backs, in carriages or strollers. Families arrived in groups, with Grandma or  Grandpa in a wheelchair, and panting dogs dragging behind on leashes.  

At nine we walked down to Congress Park to see the fireworks. As we entered the grounds, we had to hopscotch our way around hundreds of families, sitting on fold out chairs, blankets, and leaning on trees. The main road that runs through the park was so densely populated it merged into a blurry profile of a thousand faces.

When I took my last look out the bedroom window and went to sleep unbridled with plot twists and hooks, I realized whatever the reason I think I came here for, has nothing to do with what happened. It’s like writing; will, commitment, and a new laptop have nothing to do with it. You don’t know how or when the plot will lay down right on the page, or why a village you think you don’t belong to suddenly feels like home, or what turns out to be the right job, or the wrong mate. You just have to continue pushing the cart in the direction you think you want to go, and leave a margin of uncertainty for adventures in livingness.  Any dice to throw email:folliesls@aol.com    

JOCKEYS

In CULTURE, DICE, HORSERACING, LIFESTYLE COLUMNIST, SMILEY'S DICE, THE JOCKEYS, kentucky derby on May 2, 2008 at 6:17 pm

 

 

     After spending several summers in Saratoga Springs, I discovered I loved thoroughbred horseracing. All my life I’ve been a performing arts spectator. I never watch any sports on television and only attended baseball games when my father needed a companion. The art of performance is what led me to experience the racetrack as live theater.

     The racetrack is a stage, the jockeys are the actors, and the men and women that fill the bleachers, the picnic grounds, the Turf Club, and the private boxes are the audience. The racehorse is the star celebrity.

     The tickets for admission, like any show, are based on your seating. You can walk through the gates for $3.00, or you can buy a box for $100,000 a year. The collage of human emotions, drama, suspense, and danger, are key components to good theater.

     Gambling personifies the Shakespearean twist of the racetrack. High rollers and drugstore cowboys wager to win. Some men walk out with a grocery cart of recycled cans; some walk out with enough money to buy a racehorse. They leave by the same gate, and the next day they come back for

more. But why, I ask, is thoroughbred racing not considered an all-around American sport? Why don’t jockeys get athletic respect? These two spheres of lightning truth struck me while I trampled through the mud one rainy August day at Saratoga Racetrack.

I asked around for opinions. The Governor’s bodyguard remarked that it was a good question. He did not think gambling was the reason because people bet on sports all the time. He thought maybe that it was because as kids we don’t learn to race horses, like baseball and football. The public is naïve about jockeys because they have never raced. Another answer I heard was that 200,000 fans fill a ballgame on any given day, and that those numbers don’t compare with horseracing.

     I’m not a bettor, and I don’t ride very well, but I am a drama whore. I took my notebook to the jocks’ room to ask the jockeys what they thought about this irregularity in sports. Jose Santos had a few minutes to spare.

     “Jose, do you feel like America thinks of you as an athlete?”

     “We don’t get the respect that we should. I think it’s the gambling. This is the greatest racetrack in America, and there is gambling in every sport, but when you come to the track, you see it right there, and people cannot avoid it. Pound for pound, we are more fit than most athletes.”

     I asked Jose what he does aside from riding. He jogs three miles every day and walks for a mile. He reminded me that if he goes down with the horse, his strength is what gets him back up again. Another misconception is that jockeys only ride for 2 minutes. Well, the race is 2 minutes, but they ride every day of the year. They do not take breaks.

     “How does the public perceive you?” I asked.

     “In Europe they are treated like movie stars. Over here the jockey is just another person, and in sports, the jockey is low. I wish we had more respect, but we don’t get the publicity.”

     This feels like the guts of the truth; our little minds like to align with other like minds. The leaders of the pack go to football and baseball, and the media follows behind.

     Jose remarked that the only time he felt real enthusiasm and support was when he won the Triple Crown. Otherwise, they get a little column in the paper with the results. “The Racing Form is 100 pages, and nothing is written about us.”

     “What if there was a Jockey Magazine?”

     “Well, that would be great. Then the companies would be interested, and we’d get sponsors. When I go out to the park and run, I wear Nikes too.” He chuckled.

    “Have they ever approached you for sponsorship?”

    “No, I don’t expect they will.”

 A few days later I found Jerry Bailey before a race. It was a cinch to get into the jocks’ room in those days. That was before Elliott Spitzer sipped all the fizz out of Saratoga Race Track. These days the Press can’t walk inside the jocks’ room.  Jerry hopped onto a counter and extended his hand.

“How are you?”

“Great Jerry, thank you for meeting me.”

“Sure.”

“Jerry, I’m very interested in the lack of sports sponsorship offered jockeys. Why do you think that is?

“Because no one is promoting us.  If you don’t do anything to promote us, how does anyone know? They have bobble heads and gimmicks like that, but there isn’t even a Jockey Calendar. Excuse me now; I’ve got to ride a race.”

 Of all the risk takers and entrepreneurs in the world, horse racing is the champion in all categories. If I made a decision to understand the business and attend every race, meet every owner, jockey and trainer, there’s no chance I’d really understand anything more, because I do not love the horse the way a jockey does, and you can’t fool the horse!

   During the Hall of Fame Induction presentation at Saratoga a few years back, D. Wayne Lucas made a speech that drew a full house of gregarious applause. This is an excerpt:

 “You ride a great horse, and the owner wakes up the next day and decides to switch to Bailey. The adversity is unbelievable, it is a gut wrenching, bring you to your knees humbling business, whether you’re a rider, trainer, owner, or breeder. There’s one thing that will keep you going, and that is simply your attitude. Attitude is the most important decision you make everyday. Make it early, and make sure you make the right one. You will have a very full and very peaceful life.”

 Maybe it’s time for a Jocks Nike, call it the Two Minute Nike. 

  

 

SPRING & WOMAN

In ARTS, CREATIVE NON-FICTION, CULTURE, DICE, LIFESTYLE, MEMOIR, PERSONAL, SANTA FE WRITER, SMILEY'S DICE on April 3, 2008 at 5:21 pm

Smiley’s Dice  Adventures in Livingness

                                                 Luellen Smiley 

 The throw of the dice this week lands on the wind and the chime. At three in the morning the walls of reality merge with dreams, namelessness, restlessness, and an alertness of unspoken needs.     What I think of at three in the morning is never the same at ten o’ clock in the morning.  The labyrinth of safety, colliding with the unknown, seems to be the most innocent of emotions. It is also a time that  springs bright eyed realizations, recognitions, and a time when our mirrors move toward us.  I see my looks fading. All I ever wanted was to be as pretty as my mother was.      The wind is sudden as it whips through the spruce tree outside my window.   

I get up and wander downstairs, listening to the wood floors crackle at my footstep.  I walk outdoors onto the back porch.  The wind is like a mirror to me. This sound, so clear and unmixed in Santa Fe,  brings me back to my adolescent years in Hollywood. The nights my father went out,  allowing me the freedom to explore outside. I would run down Doheny Drive to Santa Monica Boulevard and just keep running.  It was on those windy Santa Ana nights that I’d run the longest.  I was running because the need to express something was bulging through my soul.  Back then I didn’t keep a journal at home. My father had discovered it and then questioned me about everything I’d written. 

 This night is like that, only I don’t feel like running, I am listening to the sound of the wind and the chimes.  I’m thinking of the music of Charles Lloyd, and the shadows that look like ghosts, and the clouds that appear to have messages,  and how everything is different when you are alone.  I dine without pause and usually finish before I’ve even wiped my mouth. I have extended conversations with the cats, Bugsy and Alice,  and moments are elongated.  I sit down at the counter and this wind and chime continues to circulate the house. It is an announcement- it is expectant of spring.  I jotted down some notes and knew what I wished to write about today. 

April is expectant- there is expectancy everywhere you look. The buds on the stark tree limbs are about to bloom, the birds have evacuated their nests and begin singing early in the morning, and insects eject themselves from their hidden corners. I don’t know what spring is like for a man, I’ve never asked any man, but I am going to tell you what spring is like for one woman. 

 The essence of spring is sensuous, and for a woman it is an overture.We strip down the layers of clothing; replacing socks with sandals, and sweaters with t-shirts.  When I hear birds and watch them in the trees, I think of babies, and innocence. There are flowers about to shoot through the heavy clasp of winter dormancy, and when they do, the colors remind me to replace all the black pants and turtlenecks with pastel shades of coral and blue.     The sunlight radiates through my skin and warms every thing. My heart  feels like it has been through a tune up.  My body wants to dowse in sea water, eat less,   run up canyon road,  listen to music,  dine al fresco, and get pedicures. Men, do notice your woman’s new pedicure, it will make her very happy.  All of this preparation is to tune up the romantic notes,  and to get YOUR ATTENTION. It is time to bring you out of the garage, or wherever you go in spring, and to notice that we are blooming. This is what I felt the night I heard the Charles Lloyd Quartet;  I heard them blooming.    Surprise us with flowers, a new hat, or a picnic on the banks of the Rio Grande.  Spring is time to redirect your attention to woman because we are at our best in spring.  Our attention is on our surroundings; we will want to buy flowers, and baskets and new cushions for the patio furniture.   We change our lipstick color, comb our hair different, and we look for new ways of expressing how good we feel.   Today I see cherry blossoms in my neighbors’ yard.  They remind me of

a day in April at Golden Gate Park.  Then I feel young again, like I was in the park that day, when I was in love with a man who would prove to be one of the great adventures of my life. 

If you live in Santa Fe then you understand when I say-hurry up spring and start undressing!   “Is there any feeling in a woman stronger than curiosity? Fancy seeing, knowing, touching what one has dreamed about. What would a woman not do for that? Once a woman’s eager curiosity is aroused, she will be guilty of any folly, commit any imprudence, venture upon anything, and recoil from nothing.”Excerpt from Guy De Maupassant, “An Adventure in Paris.”    

SMILEY’S DICE ON SPRING & WOMAN

In ARTS, CREATIVE NON-FICTION, CULTURE, DICE, LIFESTYLE, MEMOIR, PERSONAL, SANTA FE WRITER, SMILEY'S DICE on April 3, 2008 at 5:20 pm

SMILEY’S DICE

In ARTS, CREATIVE NON-FICTION, CULTURE, DICE, ENTERTAINMENT, LIFESTYLE, LIFESTYLE COLUMNIST, MEMOIR, PERSONAL, RELATIONSHIPS, SMILEY'S DICE on April 2, 2008 at 3:11 pm

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In CREATIVE NON-FICTION, DICE, LIFESTYLE COLUMNIST, SANTA FE WRITER, SMILEY'S DICE on January 27, 2008 at 6:04 pm